Mental Health Blog - 25th October 2019

 Mental Health Blog - 25th Oct

It's been quite a while since I've written one of these. As I've been unwell (a perforated eardrum with infection - so antibiotics) and trying to work at the same time. So my energy has been completely zapped, which did lead to my demons (anxiety) having a rock concert in my head one or two of the days. Then my depression had an extra fun after-party and I found myself lashing out at people. Also, I kept making 'cry for help' remarks with the words "kill myself" and "what's the point". So lucky Russ is quick to pick up on those and knows how to deal with me. God one of those days I wanted to cry and could I cry NO… Ugh… So irritating! If I could just get it out. Anyway, thank fuck those feelings don't last as long these days. 

I have been trying to be honest about my feelings and then allowing myself to talk Russ and others around me. Then making damn sure I am doing the self-care, such as put the blanket over my head (in the knowledge I am not letting anyone down) with the odd scream at Russ "Where is the chocolate? I need affection!" then later on having a bath - maybe with a Bath bomb (fancy I know). Turning those dark days into just dark moments that I can shrug off the worst of in an evening and a good sleep. 

Which has meant regardless of being unwell and having the odd 'FFS' day. I have been doing really well. I am starting to get my CV together and having conversations to start changing my career (not much done yet, throwing the net out).

Also, I have started 28-day abs challenge. I am on day 3 and back down the gym with no injuries - the videos of my gym acrobatics will be returning. I gotta say the awesome feedback I have received from these blogs. Honestly, it's been really… lovely. 

As always if you are in need please reach out to who you need to, the support is there x