Mental Health Blog - 8th December 2019

 Mental Health Blog - 8th Dec

Minefields

I haven't made a blog for a couple of weeks as I haven't wanted to get into any form of airing dirty laundry as Christmas is coming and Wedding planning is ramping up. These events and times are a mindfields for everyone, especially if you suffer anxiety. Also, the people pleaser in me is going nuts as everyone wants something. But I can't make everyone happy and if I do I will make no one happy! Then I am going to devastate myself. 

So I have decided to do the math and attack things head-on. If something can't be changed don't bother, if it's annoying me confront. Then ultimately let the chips land where they fall. All this people-pleasing is just absurd, it leads to things not being said and rot setting in. 

I am not saying be a dick about things, just I am saying how I feel. If people don't like that, well they can have a conversation with me to ask why. How many times have we felt something and not known their side. Ultimately we can only go from our experience and deduce the rest. 

Also, people have got rubbish at asking "Why?" lately. Real talk! If we don't like what people post for example. We go "that's rubbish" and so forth when we should be asking "Why do you feel that?" as I believe we act on our experience. Maybe we will have more empathy and understand a bit more, IDK. However, I have also been thinking about my social media of late as I have become aware that some are becoming uncomfortable. To be honest we have the ability to see what we want to see and we used to have the ability to edit what our families saw. Before FB we could go on the lash and pull a Mooney, then go home and say I had just say "I had a few pints with the lads". Now there are pictures flying about and your Auntie sees you with a joint and that tattoo you have on your butt cheek. 

We all have a choice about what we want to see in people or see people for who they really are. TBH I want to see people for who they really are, warts and all. I spent so many years trying to give people what they wanted. It wasn't me and it made me die inside. So I swear, I drink too much occasionally, I sometimes find clothes optional, I care deeply about causes that matter to me, I have my issues and I wear my heart on my sleeve. That's me. If people don't like, sorry I can't help that. I am not actively seeking to hurt people, in fact, I have spent my entire life avoiding that outcome. 

I am gonna do what I need to do, I might get some shit wrong, that's life!